Friends, I am so angry I cannot see straight. I will be speaking once again in vague and sweeping generalities (it is fun; you should try it) in order to maintain a level of discretion. I sincerely hope that by the time I can tell you in detail what has inspired this rant, that I have long since moved on and am no longer haunted enough to bother dredging it up. That might just mean you will have to live the whole rest of your lives steeped in morbid curiosity over just what the hell KatGirl was talking about today. Sorry [insert sheepish grin].
I have been tolerating a situation for far too long, and it is about time that something happens. Unfortunately, I am likely the one who will be hurt by addressing the situation, but at this point, I want only to be done with it by whatever means necessary. How can any person who purports to "love all god's children" endeavor to - much less get away with it - treat someone so terribly?
It proves to me even more fervently that people with deep seeded and radically fundamental belief structures (religious, political, or otherwise) are the last people on earth who should be trusted. I have never encountered such pure and righteously disguised evil as I am perceiving in this particular corner of my life. How a person can make a grand public display of support and collaboration only to deliberately withhold both in private is beyond me. And how the same person can so flippantly throw the blame for that offense back on the person who was left hanging is also completely beyond me. It is cold, callous, and cruel. And apparently, completely condoned.
I know exactly what is going on, and despite my faint hopes that someone else might eventually recognize it; I fear I am approaching a pivotal point when my ability to continue to wait for that relief is overwhelmed by the fury I feel every time these situations arise Yes, situations - I am not referring to an incident, but to a string of events that begin to look very much like a pattern. It appears though that only I see the pattern (or that only I acknowledge it). In the end, I will be the one saving myself, and it will most likely appear that I am the ass. It no longer matters. Whatever the means, I have got to extricate myself from this heaping pile of crap that has become my station.
Life is too good and far too short to waste under someone else' shit.
Sorry... I told you I was pissed.
Sweet Kate will return soon. I promise.
Much love to my friends,